Tipping should not be mandatory.

But not for the reasons you think. Tipping should not only be optional, I think it should go extinct, wholesale.

“But why?” I hear you ask – here’s why.

 

1. People don’t understand what a tip is. Most people (myself included, until I worked in a restaurant and got chummy with the wait-staff) think that a tip is a voluntary kindness you give to your server for their fantastic service. Well, you’re right… sorta. In France, this is the case. However, in the good ol’ US of A, it’s only “voluntary” in the legal sense of the word. If you don’t tip the customary 15%-20%, you’re stealing. But from whom? Are you stealing from the globalsupermegachain restaurant you just ate at? Nope. You’re stealing from someone who took a job as a server to make ends meet. A college student, single mother, someone working their ass off just to get by. Which brings me to…

 

2. People take the job they can get, and that they can work – not the job that they want. Coming fresh out of working full-time at retail while going to school, I can personally vouch that when you need to be able to make rent – you take the damn job you can. Serving provides flexible hours, and work that anyone who isn’t completely toxic can do. And when I say work, you can bet your ass I mean it. I don’t think anyone will disagree that dealing with “the public” is a rough way to make a living. Especially when the public blames you, the face in front of them, for problems that they not only didn’t cause, but could in no way prevent, bringing me to…

 

3. When you stiff your server, you’re not punishing anyone but the person who brought you the food. I’m sorry that your steak (that you ordered “very well done”) was a little tough. Beef gets that way, and your server advised you against it. Oh, you didn’t tip. That hurts the cook exactly… let me do the math… zero, carry the zero… add zero…. OH! NOT A DAMNED BIT. You’ve just docked someone’s wage for something they had no hand in. Yeah, blame the server. It’s a bit like docking the cashier at the grocery store because the store is out of flan. They don’t do the orders, they don’t stock the shelves, but because your royal highness can’t eat flan – you just took pay away from the person who was doing their best to be pleasant to you and ensure a good customer service experience.

 

I could go on. The percentage system makes no sense – does a $400 bottle of wine take more work to serve than a $40 bottle? Nope! But you can bet the tip is bigger! The tipping system perpetuates racism and sexism. Busty babes get better tips than frumpy gals. White servers get tipped better than their minority counterparts. 

 

At a personal level, I tip out of compassion. I tip because anyone who works as hard as servers do should be paid $2.13 / hr. A tipping wage that hasn’t increased in 20+ years, and almost universally goes to pay taxes on the server’s tips. So yeah, I tip.

 

If you don’t tip because you’re opposed to the tipping system I dare you, next time you go out and pay with your own money that you earned at your job and didn’t have to rely on the kindness (or decency, or basic human god damn courtesy) to make ends meet, I challenge you  to look your server in the eye and tell them“Because I do not support the tipping system, I will not be tipping tonight. I expect the same quality of service and the same cost of food.”

 

If you can’t do that, look your server in the eye and notify them that you will not tip, then you’re not an activist, you’re not fighting the system – you’re just a cheap asshole who should stay at home and cook for yourself.